a pandemic love story

She rolls over and feels a cold space. Her heart skips a beat. Her bed hasn’t been empty for months now. Where is he? What’s happened? 

She hears his voice downstairs and relief fills her heart. His being home every day was the hardest transition of this pandemic life. They didn’t lose much, except his commute. He saw it as gaining time at home. She saw it as a loss of control. She used to be in charge during the day. With him at home, they now have to share.

Over time they’ve learned to talk about their feelings. Sadness over what they’ve lost—her book club and time alone, his commute and city bike rides, their Sunday mornings at church. Gratefulness too—more family time, more rest time, challenges that enable them to grow. They listen to each other more carefully. With more humility.

They’ve learned to respect each other’s dreams. He empowered her to write. She empowered him to play. They’ve learned to be together all the time, and how to take breaks, and that breaks are important.

She’s not sure how many more months they’ll have of this time together. Eventually, the world will go back to how it once was. He’ll wake up early to catch the train, making her coffee and leaving it in a travel mug on the counter before gently kissing her goodbye. He’ll lock up his bike and hop on the train and she’ll stay snug in bed.

One day the world will return to normal and they’ll miss this all-together time. They’ll look back on these days with memories of happiness and bliss. They’ll remember the challenges and celebrate how their love grew.

This post is part of a blog hop with Exhale—an online community of women pursuing creativity alongside motherhood, led by the writing team behind Coffee + Crumbs. Click here to view the next post in this series "280 Words".

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Ash Wednesday: 2021

I wasn’t happy about it. 

If it weren’t for A asking me what we were going to do for Ash Wednesday, I probably would have ignored it. Pretended it was just another day. Neglected to do anything, simply because I couldn’t have it the way I wanted. It would have been a terrible decision, and one that I would have regretted, but it would have been the easy one. Instead, I did what I felt obligated to do—I put this worship guide out into the world—it was only right that we actually used it.

I also knew if we did nothing, my girls would grow up and always remember the year we didn’t do Ash Wednesday. It would be one more thing the pandemic took away.

So when we finished eating dinner, I quietly cleared the dinner dishes and lit all the candles I could find. We turned down the lights and sang a version of Create in Me that will forever be a favorite (thanks John Tirro). I asked if anyone wanted to read from the Bible, and A jumped at the chance. I always get a little teary when I hear her read from Scripture. There’s something about hearing God’s Word from a child that gives me a new perspective on whatever is being read.

After she read from Joel, we talked about what it means to confess our sins and to return to the Lord. This is always hard for the girls. For all of us really. None of us really want to admit when we’ve been bad. We want people to love us, and if we’ve been bad, that might not be so. We want to be right. We don’t want to think about the people we’ve hurt; or the ones that have hurt us—lack of forgiveness is a sin too. 

We talked about how God is a merciful God. Slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love. And that because of that, we can feel free to confess our sins to him and know that we will be forgiven. We had a few moments of quiet as we each contemplated what to write on the blank page before us. One looked at me with tears in her eyes, so I took her to the next room and we whispered about some of the things she’s done over the last few days that might not have been the best behavior. It reminded me that sometimes it’s hard to think about what we need to confess. We get in our routine and we don’t even realize how we have turned away from God, or the need to repent—to turn back.

We folded our pieces of paper full of confessions and threw them into a bowl, praying that God would create in us clean hearts and renew right spirits within us. We lit a match and threw it in. One after another, the pieces of paper caught fire and we watched as they burned. When the smoke began to rise we feared the smoke alarm going off, so we moved the bowl to the stove and turned the vent fan on. “But I want to watch!” they cried. So we moved the stool and gathered around our bowl of sins, and watched as we lit match after match until they were finally all burned.

There’s something almost cathartic about watching your sins burn. The flames lick the edge of the bowl, the colors change from red to orange to blue and back to orange again. The paper that was once white is now black and ashy. “That looks so cool,” the littlest one said. “I love watching all the colors.”

It reminded me of a time at church camp when I was a teen. The confessing of sins and the burning of them in the courtyard outside our dorms. I don’t remember the confessions I made, but I remember how I felt when I watched them go up in flames. I remember the tears as I apologized to God for the things I had done. And I remember the way my heart felt lighter after the absolution had been proclaimed. 

After they were all gone, we moved the bowl over and let them cool. We read more Scripture, talked about what we might do during Lent to turn ourselves back towards God. And then, in the holiest of moments, the baby of the family—my tiny 6-year-old—she turned those burned sins into ashes with her hands. As she mixed them with olive oil and her fingers turned black, she took on the role of the one who reminds us. I put my finger in the bowl, turned towards her and made the mark of the cross on her forehead as I said “remember you are dust ... and to dust you shall return.”

She took great pride in reminding us all. She dipped a finger in, pulled it out, raised it up to a forehead, and in her small, quiet, 6-year-old voice, “remember you are dust....and to dust you shall return.”

For me.

For him.

For her sister.

It was in that last tender moment between sisters that I most strongly felt the presence of God among us. It was in that moment that tonight became most holy. In that moment, God took all my sorrow of being away from my beloved church community and filled my heart with a deep appreciation for this tender family worship experience we shared around the same counter we had just eaten dinner on. 

We washed her hands, then gathered in a circle to say the Lord’s Prayer together. And as I heard their little voices say the words louder and clearer than they’ve ever said them in church, I knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that this will be an Ash Wednesday we will always remember.

Not because of what it lacked, but because of how God showed up. 

Today She Turns Nine

Today she turns nine.

             Nine!

Some days it’s hard to believe nine years have gone by. Other days it feels like she’s been with us forever. 

People told me my babies would grow up. They said it would happen before I could blink. They told me that one day, those sleepless nights would be only tiny memories in the back of my mind. They told me to push through, to treasure these days; that in a few years, I would miss those tiny fingers and toes. 

Nine years later, here we are. No more tiny fingers. No more tiny toes. Not many sleepless nights. And you know what? There’s not a day that goes by that I look back on those days and wish for them again. I mean, I loved my babies dearly. I’d do it all over again to bring them into my life, but let’s be real. There was always so much work involved. 

The truth is, I like nine. It might be my favorite so far. She gets herself ready without too much prodding. She can mostly entertain herself. She plays with her sister, and with friends, without needing supervision. Homeschooling these days feels less like I’m leading her and more like we’re learning together. I’m constantly amazed by her creativity—by her ability to create masterpieces from nothing but trash. Her craftiness far surpasses my own abilities, and sometimes I can’t help but stand in awe.

Just looking at her the last few weeks has made me a little sad. She’s changing from little girl to young lady right before my eyes. Her body shows slight changes. Her muscles more defined. Her dancing is more beautiful, more grown-up, more art. Her face looks older while keeping the same features she’s always had. I love this person she is; the young lady she’s becoming. She’s empathetic and smart. She’s the best friend anyone could ever have. She has a smile that lights up the room. When I close my eyes, I see her not as the babe she once was, but as the woman she will be. 

Don’t get me wrong. She’s still a kid. She still needs her Mom—and often her biggest needs come when I feel least willing to give. Maybe that’s what God intended when he entrusted her to me. The ultimate lesson in sacrifice and love.

The days of changing diapers, of reading endless board books, of bouncing on an exercise ball, holding her against my chest, so she would get the rest she desperately needed. The days of wondering what she’s thinking or what she needs. The days of strapping her into her carseat, of saying no to outings because of the way she hates the car. Winter days where I spent far too many minutes making her stay still, so I could put all the things on her to keep her warm when she goes outside to play. Summer days where I was afraid of leaving her alone next to an inch of water, for fear she’d drown.

Those days are finally over. And I couldn’t be more glad.

As she becomes older, I shift from constant caregiver to mentor, and that is really the core of who I am. Who I have always been. 

She has changed my life—that kid—from the moment she was conceived. I had no idea how much life would change. How much I would struggle to find myself again. And yet in the parenting choices we’ve made, in my staying home with her every day, in my willingness to sacrifice my time over and over again—none of it has taken away my dreams. Instead, she’s helped me find myself again. 

For a few years, being just a mom was mostly enough. Because of her, I learned how to be mindful. I learned to be still. She taught me how to be present and how to listen; how to feel and how to love. Because of her, I learned to pray. She taught me how to sit in the messiness of emotions. I learned how to multitask, and how to creatively solve problems, and how to trust the still small voice that shows up in the middle of the night. She is the first-born child God knew I needed. Every single day, God uses her to teach me a little something more.

And now that we’ve hit this sweet spot that we’re in, she’s embracing my dreams as her own. She’s becoming not only my inspiration but also my best cheerleader. She lifts me up when I’m feeling down and hugs me when I need it most. She loves the entire world as fiercely as I love her and she is not at all afraid to show it.

I want to savor every moment of this last year of single-digit ages. Because like they tell me—my babies will grow up before I can blink. And this time I know I’ll look back and miss these days of nine.

📸 Adrian Curiel on Unsplash.

Then and Now #loveafterbabies

Then, we dressed up in our best outfits and went to the fanciest of restaurants for dinner, eating dishes we’d never heard of, sharing dreams and making plans.

Now, we send our kids outside to play so we can make a fancy lunch for two, sitting around our beat-up table in our comfiest clothes, sharing dreams and making plans.

Then, we stayed in bed until noon, ignoring our hunger for food and feeding our desire for one another.

Now, we stay up until midnight, when the kids are finally asleep and the house is quiet, ignoring our hunger for food and feeding our desire for one another.

Then, we had big dreams of one day changing the world. You believed in my dreams and encouraged me to live them, sometimes more than I believed in them myself.

Now, we know our small actions add up and change the world just a little bit every day. You believe in my dreams and encourage me to live them, often much more than I believe in them myself.

Then, we traveled on exotic vacations with nothing but a simple carry-on. Books, a camera, an outfit or two, and bathing suits would do. Just me and you, making memories that will last a lifetime.

Now, we travel on family vacations with a van full of gear. Books, a camera, too many outfits to count, and food to last for days. Me and you, plus two, making memories that will last a lifetime.

Then, we accidentally fell in love, despite what people warned. We ignored insults and together faced challenges, knowing our love was true and our relationship was worth fighting for.

Now, we purposely fall more in love each day, living a life grounded in family and in faith, ignoring insults, facing challenges, knowing our love runs deep and our relationship is always worth fighting for.

By All Means Do It!

It’s the 21st month of the year 2021. And here I am, finally ready to commit to those 21 goals that I’ve been trying to nail down over the last 21 days. I know what you’re thinking—“21 goals? Are you insane?! Shouldn’t you maybe choose one or two and really dig into those? I mean, doesn’t making 21 goals really set yourself up for failure?!”

The truth is, I probably could narrow these down a little bit, but 21 for ‘21 just sounds too good. Besides, I believe in challenging myself and dreaming big. I also believe that by speaking them into existence in a public way means I’ll actually try to work towards them, so buckle up. 2021 is going to be full of fun and excitement!

I did organize them into categories, because that made 21 feel more achievable. If you look at them in small chunks, it doesn’t feel quite so overwhelming. I’m just going to take them one step at a time—or as one of my favorite authors says, “Just take it bird by bird.”

Personal Goals

Buy new bras

You know you’re a real adult when buying bras has to be listed out as a goal in order for you to really do it. I hate buying bras. I haven’t had a good one since before I got pregnant with my oldest - and she’ll be nine in just three weeks. The last time I bought bras I got them at Costco. I can do better than that. I must. I will!

Crochet-a-long (CAL) project

For the past several years I’ve followed communities of crocheters all working on the same project and have loved watching what they make. I have a closet full of yarn that is begging to be used, so I’m going to join in this year and end up with a crocheted sampler afghan. I can’t promise it’ll be beautiful, but I can promise it will be unique.

Read—and write—more poetry

Poetry always scared me before I started homeschooling. I still have nightmares over my high school English teacher making me diagram poems and talk about their meanings. How the heck am I supposed to know what that old dead poet was thinking when he wrote this two hundred years ago?! But now that I’ve been reading and reciting poetry with my girls, I see the beauty of it. And ironically, I found a book of poems I wrote when I was in high school—so there must be a part of me that really wants to write poetry! I decided this was a personal goal instead of a writing goal, because it’s not about the writing. It’s about the appreciation of poetry.

Find a pen pal and write monthly letters

I miss the days of old-fashioned letters. I want to resurrect the habit of handwriting letters to someone, especially someone with who I may not be able to connect through social media or email. I want to find an older person—a woman I think—and share life stories through written letters. And then I want to keep them in a box until I grow old and I’ll share them with my grandkids and tell them about the time when the entire world went virtual, but I kept writing paper letters.

Disconnect from screens

Too much screentime is bad for my soul. I want to turn off my phone several days a week and on the weekends. Well, maybe not every weekend…but maybe once a month. I want to pay attention to what’s happening around me and to really be present in each moment. I want to disconnect from screens so that I can reconnect with the people and things I love.

Homeschool Goals

Teach Eden how to crochet

I’m already off to a great start with this one. It’s nice when your kids can help you achieve one of your goals right off the bat! But in all seriousness, she’s been begging me to teach her, and I just haven’t found the time to sit down with her to get her started. She’s a fast learner and is doing a great job with it, so I just need to be consistent about sitting down with her to practice several times a week.

Help Autumn make 4 outfits - 1 each season

I really struggled with writing this one down. Her greatest dream is to design and sew her own clothes. She already has a design book where she draws dress designs. I can sew pretty well, but clothes have never been something I wanted to make, so this is a challenge goal for me. Last year we found someone to give her sewing lessons, but we had to stop them because of Covid. Although ordinarily, this is something I’d find a way to outsource, for 2021 I’m going to work really hard to make this happen for her.

Write a curriculum for Nicholas mouse

I adore writing curriculum. It’s one of the things I miss most about doing ministry in a professional setting. The girls and I are reading Nicholas: A Massachusetts Tale for Geography right now, and there are so many really great opportunities to dig in. I’m making notes as we go through it and hope to be able to pull it all together in a fun little curriculum before next Fall.

Help my girls find a pen pal

Writing letters helps them practice their handwriting and composition skills in a fun and low-risk way. Besides, if I start getting mail, they’re going to want their own mail. So they’ll each need their own pen pal. Anyone interested?

Writing Goals

Write something every day

Something. Anything. Just write. If I let a day go by without writing, I will forgive myself and pick it up the very next day. The only thing that doesn’t count is a list. Because if I say writing a list counts as writing, I’ll write a book full of lists and not much of anything else. Except maybe poetry. See above.

Publish a monthly newsletter

Just as I love writing curriculum I also love writing newsletters. I love compiling all my favorite books, blog posts, recipes, and fun things to do and sharing them with the world. I have no idea if anyone will read the newsletter (you can sign up here), but I’m going to write it anyway. Because it’s fun! And it’s a way to practice writing. And because I want to.

Revamp Soul Munchies. Really think about mission, vision, and branding moving forward

This is another goal that I’ve started working on already. Soul Munchies has been around a long time and has traveled with me through many stages of life. In some ways, I still have the same vision as when I started blogging 15 years ago, but in many ways, that vision has changed. I want to spend some intentional time thinking about the purpose of this space, and start putting that vision into action.

Find places for submissions and submit at least 6 pieces of writing

This is another really scary goal for me. I’m terrified of what people think of the things I write. That fear is part of the reason I have gotten stuck so many times before when I try to be consistent in writing. But I’m learning that I have to let go of that fear so that I can be true to the person God has created me to be. And submitting writing to a publication is one way I can take a big huge risk in living into that person. If I never submit anything, I won’t ever get feedback, and I won’t ever get better. So I can do at least 6 submissions this year! Here’s to living bravely!

Financial Goals

Pay off that last credit card

Money is hard ya’ll. It’s hard to talk about, and if you don’t have a good foundation in financial planning, it’s hard to deal with. But we’ve worked hard to get to where we only have one card balance left, and this will be the year it disappears!

Pay next month’s bills with this month’s income.

This is something I’ve learned through You Need A Budget, which is the tool we use for our budgeting purposes. The goal is to pay next month’s budget with the money that comes in this month. Once you can do that, you end up with a safety net that helps tremendously when surprise expenses come your way. You know, when the car battery decides to die when you least expect it. Or the fireplace refuses to turn on when it’s the coldest day of the year. Not that either of those has happened to me already this year.

Save for a tow hitch and a camper.

Once we can meet the first two financial goals, we want to save for a camper. With family over 1000 miles away, our annual vacation typically ends up being a visit to Georgia. While we love that visit, we also want to see other parts of the country. A camper will allow us to take road trips without needing to buy flights or pay for lodging, which means we can travel more often and to more places!

Physical Goals

Exercise 5 days a week

It can be yoga. It can be hiking. It can be playing Just Dance. Just MOVE.YOUR.BODY!

Eat Breakfast every day

This is hard for me because I hate breakfast. But it’s the most important part of the day, and it makes my body function better, and it makes me be a better parent, so I’ll do it. This is going to be the year that I find creative ways to eat breakfast. Like eating leftovers from the night before. Or making tacos. Or eating beans on toast. So long boring breakfast. 2021 is the year of the Fun Breakfast!

Drink water before coffee

I’ve been working on this for several months now and I’m still not very good at it. Goals.

Food Goals

Empty my freezers before CSA season

We are heading back to our beloved Springdell Farm this season and have a huge CSA share coming starting in Spring. Although we have two chest freezers that supply our food throughout the winter, neither one was completely empty before the 2020 season began. They both need a good defrost before storing 2021 produce for next winter, so the next few months we’re eating as much as we can out of them. It’s really my favorite time of the year, because I can basically never leave the house and still eat really well.

Bake my way through my bread book.

I got an awesome new Sourdough book last year featuring recipes with a Latin American twist, and I have not been disappointed with anything I’ve made from it. I want to make every recipe in the book this year. And never have to buy any kind of bread/tortilla product ever again.

So there you have it. The 21 ways I’m going to make 2021 an excellent year. Ahhh … just writing them makes me feel like I’m going to be successful. I already feel better about life, don’t you?

2021: Breathe

How about a real-life fairy tale on this rainy Saturday?

Once upon a time there was a young woman who discovered a long lost secret about herself—she loved to write. Not only did she love to write, but she was really very good at it. People would tell her how her words spoke to them, and how she really should write more often. 

One day, she found herself in a place where she loved it so much, that she gave up her entire career to focus on writing. She knew she could make a difference in the world with her words-and now was the time.

And then she got pregnant.

And she had terrible morning sickness for 42 weeks. Writing was hard, but she made time here and there to at least try.

She found a new creative stride after the baby was born, but then she got pregnant again. 

And had a miscarriage.

And got pregnant, again with terrible morning sickness for 42 weeks. This time while also caring for a toddler.

She had her second baby.

And then—just as she found her stride as a stay-at-home mama of two, her partner got a job offer and they moved across the country. 

She hated it there. Their apartment was falling apart, and the city felt too busy. There was no room for creativity here. So, in an attempt to find a place they could call home, without needing to find a new job, they moved again.

And a few months later, they moved again.

No matter how hard she tried to fall in love with this new home, she still hated it. She felt like she was dying inside. It felt like her creativity was dead. She longed to be someplace else.

So - they moved once again. And this time, for the first time in a very long time, she felt at home. At peace. Full of hope. And even a little joy.

Two years after finding this new home that brings life and love and peace, she found her stride. Her creative spark ignited once again and felt ready to be set aflame.

And then the world turned upside down.

You’ve probably guessed it by now, but I was that young woman. Had you asked me ten years ago where I’d be today, I would never tell you I’d be at home full time, homeschooling my two children, in a north shore suburb of Boston, Massachusetts. I had a much different plan. A plan to be writing full time. A plan to be widely published, in blogs, in magazines, in books. A plan to have connections near and far.

But I, like so many other parents once their babies arrive, put my own dreams on hold while I figured out what I wanted life to look like. I did it willingly—not begrudgingly. I always knew the time wasn’t right. There were too many things that made it too hard to say yes—and too easy to say no—and my heart just wasn’t completely in making those dreams a reality. 

2020 was supposed to be my year. I intentionally chose the word Story as my guiding light for the year. I started January off with a bang, and then the world started getting a little too crazy. By the time mid-February rolled around, Covid was a real threat in our community, and life began to be about survival more than anything else. I pushed my Story right to the back burner as I dug in to caring for my family. I put all my creative energy into making the small things extra special in this weird world we now found ourselves living in. Now that I look back on 2020, I see that Story did permeate through our family life but in a very different way than I intended.

I’m a lover of New Year’s Day. I love a clean slate. I love a chance to vision and dream and look forward with intention. But 2021 hit me by surprise. Perhaps it was because January 1, 2021 didn’t feel much different than December 31, 2021. The political climate was still divisive—and even downright scary. The virus numbers are worse than ever before, and the need to stay close to home is more prevalent now than it ever was in 2020. Although there’s some hope in the distance, it doesn’t look like 2021 will be the beacon of light that we’re all longing for. So I let the start of 2021 pass me by. It took me a good two weeks of living into the year before I became ready to set an intention for the year. And now here I am - finding myself in a place where I *think* I’m ready to do more than just think about being creative once again. 

This week, I took a big deep breath and took a plunge into the deep, sometimes dark, sometimes frigidly cold water of creativity. I inhaled, I exhaled, I inhaled, and I just went for it. This week I made a commitment to myself, to my family, and to my dreams - 2021 will be my year. 

2021 will be the year I breathe life back into the dream that’s been set aside for far too long. I hope you’ll come along with me and maybe even breathe some new life into dreams of your own.

Photo by Eddie Kopp on Unsplash.

Gramma's Swedish Tea Ring

In a year when it seems like so many traditions have to be put on hold, I’ve been trying to find ways to make Christmas extra special and meaningful. So this week, we dug deep and revived a family tradition that’s been lost for several years.  

When I was meal planning for Christmas Eve and Christmas, I remembered that my Gramma—and then later my Aunt—always made some kind of bread ring. I always wake up SUPER early on Christmas. I have never been an early riser, but on Christmas, my body has always had an internal alarm clock. Even now, as a 40-year-old Mom, I’m the one that wakes up at 5am and creeps down the stairs to see the magic that has appeared under the Christmas tree overnight. When I was young, we would start opening presents not long after waking, then take a break between opening presents to eat the delicious bread-ring-thingy—but before this week, I didn’t remember anything else about said bread ring.

So I did what I do whenever I want to revive a family tradition that has somehow gotten misplaced - I texted my Mom’s oldest sister, my dear Aunt Jay. She sent me the recipe—for what I now know is called a Swedish Tea Ring—and reminded me that when she was growing up, Gramma would make several batches, wrap them in foil, put them in a wagon, and walk up and down her neighborhood delivering them to her friends. Um, hello, that totally sounds like something I would do. 

And then I realized - in this weird year where it feels like nothing is normal, making dozens of Swedish Tea Rings and delivering them to all my friends is something that doesn’t have to be put on hold! Maybe I can’t have Christmas dinner with anyone outside my home, but I can absolutely provide a tasty breakfast treat to everyone I know!

And after our taste test this afternoon, I can promise you this is a family tradition that won’t be misplaced ever again.

And just in case you want to make your own Swedish Tea Ring for Christmas morning, here’s the recipe! One batch makes 2 big rings or 4 small rings - perfect for sharing with your friends and neighbors.

Gramma's Swedish Tea Ring

Beverage Family Recipe
Makes 2 large rings or 4 small

Ingredients for bread:
4 1/2 tsp active dry yeast
1/4 cup warm water
1/4 cup shortening
1/2 cup sugar
Nuts, raisins, craisins, cherries as desired
1 cup milk, scalded
1 tsp salt
2 eggs, beaten well
1 tsp lemon zest
4 1/2 cups all purpose flour

Ingredients for filling:
3 Tbsp melted butter
1 cup brown sugar
1 Tbsp cinnamon

Ingredients for glaze:
1 cup powdered sugar
3 Tbsp water

Instructions:

1. Dissolve yeast in warm water.

2. Pour scalded milk into large bowl (or the bowl of your Kitchenaid Mixer). Add shortening, sugar and salt to the scalded milk. Cool to lukewarm.

3. Add yeast, eggs and lemon zest to the cooled mixture. Add flour and beat well. If using a stand mixer, use the beater attachment here.

4. Switch to dough hook and knead on low for 5 minutes. If by hand, turn onto floured board to knead til smooth, satiny, and supple.

5. Place dough in a greased bowl, cover and let rise til doubled.

6. Once doubled, punch the dough down and divide into two (or four) pieces. Roll each piece into a rectangle approximately 1/4 inch thick. Brush with butter and sprinkle liberally with cinnamon and brown sugar. Add raisins and nuts if desired.

7. Now roll the dough tightly (as if you're making a cinnamon roll) and form into rings. Pinch the ends together.

8. Make cuts 1 inch apart all the way around, and fairly deep. Turn outward to open the cuts. My Gramma always put pecans and cherries in the cuts - but I left them plain this time around.

9. Cover with a tea towel and let rise in a warm place for an hour or so.
10. Bake at 375 for 20-25 minutes - until golden brown. Let cool completely. Drizzle with powdered sugar glaze.

11. Once completely cool, wrap in foil. I like to freeze them until I give them away (or until I want to eat it). Take out of the freezer before you go to bed on Christmas Eve. On Christmas morning, when you make your coffee, put the foil wrapped ring directly in a 250-degree oven for 15-20 minutes or until warm and gooey.

Homeschooling 101: Where Do I Start?

Several weeks ago my inbox was flooded with messages from frantic parents. The message was always something like this …

I think I’m going to have to homeschool this year. Can you help me figure out what to do?

So I put together a survey, and did a short Zoom call. Would you believe that up to this point, I had successfully avoided using Zoom during #corona?? But this seemed like a good reason to give in and go virtual. With parents all across America trying to figure out how to best set up their home environments for learning, I felt like maybe I had a few things to share. I promised to share much of that information in a blog series, so today I bring you Part One, with many other posts to follow this week.

I’m no expert in homeschooling, but after 4 years of trying to figure things out, I have learned a thing or two, and am happy to share what I know with those of you feeling overwhelmed and out of sorts. Whether you are feeling like you want to go all in with homeschooling, or your kids will be home for Virtual/Remote Learning, I hope this series of posts can give you some helpful hints and help you feel more at peace.

Let’s get started, shall we?

Homeschooling 101: Where Do I Start?

First of all, take a deep breath. You can do this. Remember that we are living in a unique time in our life. This is a historical time - we’ve never lived through something like this. Some of our great-grandparents may have experienced something similar back during the Spanish Flu of 1918, but the world was vastly different then. This is a temporary time in our lives. We will come out of it changed, for sure, but this year (or two, depending on how long it takes), will not ruin our children’s education. Or their socialization. So stop what you’re doing, and just breathe.

One of the best pieces of advice someone gave me 4 years ago was to not get caught up in the many years of education ahead of us, but to simply focus on making a decision for the most immediate school year. Every year circumstances change, and educational needs of each child change, and there may be a time when homeschooling doesn’t fit for one or both of our children. So we give ourselves a lot of flexibility to change things as needed. Many of you are looking at homeschooling for just one year, due to COVID-19, and this advice is crucial for you. Don’t stress about your child’s educational plan past this year. Focus only on this year ahead of you.

Now that you’re laser focused on just the 2020-2021 school year, sit down and list out your priorities and vision for your year together. Remember, these are YOUR priorities. The choice you make is 100% okay - this is a no judgment zone! Some questions to think about:

Do you have to work while also schooling your child? Do you have to go into an office? Do you have to work at home, and if so, is it a flexible schedule - or do you have certain hours?

If you have to work do you have people that can help while you work?

Does Virtual Learning through the school system mean your kids will be on the computer 5 hours a day instead of in a classroom? If so, is that something you’re okay with?

Do you have the freedom to forget about standardized education for a year and create something different?

Do you have babies or toddlers to care for in addition to school-aged children?

What do you want your days to look like? Do you want freedom in your days (and do you have the ability to create that freedom), or is it better for your family to have a stricter routine/schedule each day?

Once you’ve thought about your family priorities, sit down and create a Vision for your homeschool year. We choose to homeschool, year after year, because we want a different lifestyle than the one traditional schooling forces upon us. This year, many of us are forced into a different lifestyle, so if you have the freedom to stay home with your kids and a work schedule that can be flexible, I encourage you to think of this year as a year of living intentionally together. This is a wonderful opportunity for you to create a year of learning and a year of memories that you can look back on as a special time together - even in the midst of turmoil around our world.

I know I know …. but you’re worried about whether or not your kids will be able to transition back to public/private school after this year, right? Trust me on this … they will be fine. There are tons of studies that show that kids who are homeschooled transition just fine into a regular school setting - and many times they actually go back to school ahead of their peers. And besides that, listen to me when I say this …. this is ONE year. You are not going to completely screw up your kids’ education in one year.

Yes, you can do this. It’s going to be hard, but it’s going to be so rewarding in the end. I’m going to walk you through creating one of the most memorable years of your children’s childhood  - so take a step back, and just breathe. Nothing worth doing well is ever easy.

Today’s Assignments:

1. List your Priorities

2. Create a Vision

Then come back here tomorrow and we’ll talk about creating a schedule for your year of learning together.

More Homeschooling 101 here.

Photo by Element5 Digital on Unsplash.

Celebrating Palm Sunday At Home

The hardest part of self-isolating during this strange time of our lives is that it is encroaching on the holiest of weeks. I can’t tell you how many times over the last week I’ve wanted to just cancel Holy Week and pretend it will happen later in the year. I miss my church. I miss singing with the organ. I miss sitting in the Sanctuary and simply feeling the presence of God.

My church, like many others, has been live-streaming worship on Sunday mornings, but it doesn’t really feel like worship when I sit on my couch and watch a screen. There’s no standing and sitting as one big group of people. There are no pews to sit in (or crawl under if you’re my youngest daughter). There are no hugs. There’s no sitting around tables talking about your week as your kids go back for more and more cookies and cupcakes. I’ve found that the addition of technology to church has been more of a damper on this time of stay-at-home than it has been uplifting, so we’ve just been pretending that we’re choosing to miss church these last few weeks.

But ya’ll … this Sunday is Palm Sunday. The Sunday where we remember Jesus’ triumphant entry to Jerusalem and begin our remembrance of his last days. I can’t just pretend to not go to Palm Sunday worship. I’m not sure I’ve ever, in my entire life, missed worship during Holy Week. The last thing I really want to do is create my own Palm Sunday celebration - but if my only choices are to pretend it’s not happening or make a meaningful celebration at home, I’ll chose the latter.

If you - like me - are finding yourself in this place of mourning and sadness, I encourage you to take a few steps to make your Palm Sunday a meaningful one. I thought I’d share with you the things we’re going to do together as a family. I’m keeping it simple, because the last thing I need is anxiety over making meaningful experiences. Remember - the most meaningful part of the day will be the connections and the memories that you make.

Wear Purple! 

Purple is the color of royalty and power. One of the most profound parts of Palm Sunday is the realization that Jesus - the King - rides into town on a donkey. It’s the story of a royal parade - so dress for the occasion!

Start with a Parade!

Remember Jesus’ procession with your own parade around your house or neighborhood. If you don’t have palms, collect pine boughs from your backyard. Or make paper palms - there’s a great tutorial here and a cool printable here.

There are several songs you can use for this procession - one of my favorites is “Prepare Ye the Way of the Lord.”  True story - I had no idea until today that this song was in Godspell. We used to sing it at church camp and it’s always one of my favorite Call to Worship songs. Thanks to my good friend DHawk for pointing out the connection. Another option that we often use in church is All Glory Laud and Honor.

Read the Bible Together

After you’ve had your parade, sit down and read aloud the story of Jesus’ procession into Jerusalem. We’ll be reading the account from Matthew, because it’s what our church will be using. You can find it in Matthew 21:1-11. After you’ve read the story together, talk about what it may have felt like to be there, on the streets of Jerusalem, as Jesus passed you by. What parts of the passage stuck out to you as you heard it? Did you notice something new?

When you feel like your discussion is complete, say a prayer together, thanking God for the words. Pray for people and situations on your heart, and just allow each other a brief moment of silence and reflection.

Create Something Together

Being creative is one of the best ways to make powerful memories together - and is one way that you can make your Palm Sunday extra special in the absence of a regular worship service.

If you were able to get palms, consider turning them into palm crosses to hang up around your house. You could hang them in your windows, or on a mantel, or you can save them and use them on your Holy Week altar (more about that coming soon!)

Or, maybe you want to do a simple painting of palms to hang on your wall, or in your window, or on your family altar. You can use this same tutorial to draw palms with sidewalk chalk on your driveway or neighborhood sidewalks (but remember to stay away from other people!)

If you’re feeling really crafty and have lots of arts supplies, consider making a hosanna banner. Cut out a piece of white fabric - or you can use a big piece of white paper. Use craft paint or felt letters to put the word “hosanna” on your fabric or paper. Then hang it on your front door for the whole neighborhood to see!

Whatever you choose to do, you will always look back and remember “that time when the churches were closed and we had to remember our faith at home.” My prayer for you this weekend is that you find a way to make those memories powerful ones. May God bless you and sustain you in your journey this week.

Photo by Grant Whitty on Unsplash.

On Giving Thanks in a Time Such As This

Yesterday I granted myself - and you - permission to grieve. Permission to feel anger and sadness. Permission to wonder all the terrible wonders that are rolling around in your head. Permission to admit that this is not normal. This is not our new normal. Don’t think of it like that … and ignore those people who do. Life will change after this, but I’m confident that the changes are going to be for the better in the long run.

So today, I’m turning the coin. I am - in true Pollyanna fashion - finding the good in the midst of this struggle. Because there’s always good. I’m looking at the ways in which our life might look different at the end of this - and giving thanks for the so many positives in my life.

I’m giving thanks for my husband’s job. A job where he can do all of his work remotely. A job that is secure and important and isn’t going anywhere in the midst of an economic downturn. A job where he is not on the frontlines. A job where he is allowed and encouraged to be safe, at home.

And because he’s not doing his usual commute, we have time every day to explore the hundreds of hiking trails around us. I’m giving so much thanks for the early Spring weather that has been gifted to us this year. Weather that’s allowing us to get outdoors and enjoy sunshine.

I’m celebrating the empty calendar. I made a list of all the things I’d do if I had no other obligations, and I’m crossing a few off each day. Yesterday I made homemade sourdough bread, preserved Meyer lemons, and Strawberry Lemon Marmalade. Today I have peach butter on the stove.

My heart is beyond full for my family - who taught me from a very early age how to store food during peak harvest seasons. My grandma and aunts taught me how to garden. My mom taught me how to can jams and jellies and peppers and salsa. I’ve been living this life of food preservation all my life - and now I know just how important it is.

I’m giving thanks for my local farms who provide good food for my family. CSAs who take such good care of us in peak harvest seasons that we have plenty of food in the freezer to get us through at least a month without buying much of anything at all. Farms who believe in the importance of serving their communities, operate year round, and are doing what they can to provide food for their people in the midst of this time of uncertainty.

I’m singing praises to God through virtual worship services and evening prayers and hymn sings in a way that I haven’t done in a really long time. I’m able to “attend” worship services at churches that are so near and dear to me - yet are hundreds of miles away - and it’s making my heart break right open into this mess of joy and sadness all at the same time. Isn’t that what faith is all about after all? Sadness for the world as it is, while at the same time this immense feeling of joy that God loves us and we belong to God. The many church communities that have sustained me throughout my almost-40-years of life are now sustaining me from afar.

I’m ever so thankful for a craft room full of yarn and sewing supplies. For a basement full of scrap wood and building tools. For an extended family who - although they are super far away - can walk me through just about any craft or building project I could ever want to attempt.

I continue to be amazed at how we ended up in this place we now call home and just how much it fills us up. We’re surrounded by woods and trails and it just feels like a safe haven in the middle of a storm. We can climb trees, explore nature, lay in the hammock, swing in the swing, plant a garden, or just bring a blanket and read a book outside. The vast space that belongs to us is not lost on me in this time of “staying at home.”

I’m grateful for the hard work I’ve done over the last two years in really understanding what a good homeschool life looks like for us. We have a library full of books right in our own home. We have puzzles and games and toys to spark creativity and imagination. We have an entire room of craft and art supplies. We have thousands of ideas that we’ve been too busy to work on, and now we actually have time to dig in to some of those things. I know that my kids are learning even when we aren’t doing “lessons” and I’m not afraid of days full of free play.

These are just a few of the things I’m giving thanks for today. The list goes on and on, and as I write this, my privilege is not lost on me. But just as yesterday was for feeling sad, today is for giving thanks. For filling up my cup with praise and thanksgiving so that I can look forward to how I can use these gifts that I’m given - this privilege that I’m living - to help those people around me that aren’t in the same place.

Tell me …. what are you giving thanks for today?

Photo by Rajiv Bajaj on Unsplash.